Tag Archives: loss

Waking Up From A Dream

4 Mar

Dreams can be funny things and by funny, I guess I mean not so funny.  Last night I dreamed about someone, someone I used to know. I wasn’t thinking of this person as I drifted off to la la land and I don’t spend a great deal of time and energy thinking about this individual on a regular basis, but for whatever reason they made what felt like a very real appearance in my dreams last night.

I found myself waking up in the wee small hours of the morning, with tears on my pillow and an ache in my heart that felt almost unbearable.   In the dream, I was saying good-bye again and as I woke my body was physically feeling the heartache.  I got up to use the restroom and hoped as I laid back down that I would dream a new dream.

The dream and the feelings it left me with have lingered with me today.  A bit of a blanket of sadness and reflection and I am reminded that dreams in our awake life can kinda feel like this as well.

When a dream ends, sometimes, you need to feel the pain.  It’s ok to acknowledge the loss.  To learn that the heartache can hit you like a tidal wave but when it washes over you, to discover you are still standing.  That you can feel the heartbreak and keep breathing.  To realize, you can move forward after loss.   To understand you can mourn what was and what may never be but also look forward to the unending potential of new glorious dreams.

Maybe my dream last night was just to help give me permission to mourn that which feels like a loss but also to remember that there are other dreams to know.  To recognize that I can feel the pain that comes with the loss and still have hope for all that is to come.  Maybe you could use that same reminder today?

Be encouraged my friend!

The Christmas Blues

11 Dec

Well, this isn’t the happy little Christmas blog, I had anticipated writing, but it has come to my mind several times already this Christmas season, how melancholy I can sometimes feel during this “most wonderful time of year” and I see it in those around me as well.

I remember growing up going to my Grandma & Grandpa’s house every Christmas Eve, where we would hang out with the family around the very obnoxiously tinseled tree and we would open whatever Grandma had picked out for us that year from the Sears catalog. I don’t know how poppin’ of a party it truly was, but I sure look back on it fondly and even though my grandparents have now been gone for more of my life than I had them here, I still miss them at Christmas and every Christmas Eve feels a little empty.

I’ve been thinking about my Uncle who left us too early and loved to be around all of his family. I remember him sharing his heart in letters with us, I remember crying and laughing together as a family and wish that he could be here with us this year and the heart hurts.

I think of my friend from youth group Bill whose birthday was this past week.  He was such a pillar to so many people especially his family and left us far to soon after battling cancer.

We all have stories, we all have loss and if we look around long enough we can see more heartache and sadness than we care to, but there is something about the Christmas Season and the traditions and nostalgia that comes with it that make us long even more to be with those we miss, whether they are still on this earth and we are separated by distance or whether they have left this world and taken a piece of us with them.

You know, it’s ok to feel the loss and to mourn it, a matter of fact it’s important.  However, I would encourage each of you even as you may be dealing with your own sense of sadness or grief to look around and count your blessings, tell those you hold dear that you love them, let them know what they mean to you and reach out to those who are feeling lonely this Christmas.

The truth is…the one whose birth we celebrate at Christmas loves us every day of the year and He will never leave us or forsake us and that means that even when we walk through difficult places, He is there.  We are not alone.

Wishing each of you joy and peace this Christmas!