In the Waiting…

In my college years, I was a nanny for the cutest little curly red haired baby girl you ever did see! Her parents traveled quite a bit and it was not unusual that I would often make a drive to the airport to pick up or drop off one of them. Often times, the little one and I would venture into the airport and wait for their arrival.

During these times, I loved to people watch. I would write stories in my mind of who the other individuals at the gate were waiting on and then see how right I might’ve been when their person got off the plane and they were reunited. One particular trip to the airport I remember watching a lady at another gate as she was waiting, she was watching intently at each person who was deplaning and after each one filed past her and no other bodies were left to exit, she was still waiting…

I wonder if you identify with that feeling? That waiting feeling.

At the very beginning of Luke Chapter 1, we meet a couple of people who are well acquainted with that waiting feeling. Zachariah and Elizabeth had been waiting to make a family. They were hoping for a child and they had been waiting and waiting…years of waiting. Years that likely started off with much prayer and hopefulness and years that turned into dwindling dreams and doubt from all the waiting.

Waiting is not pleasant to talk about is it? Starting is exciting and finishing is fulfilling, but waiting, well that’s the difficult stuff. Waiting is the part where it’s hard work but there’s nothing to show for it. Waiting is a test and you’re never sure how long it will last. Waiting can even be a physical ache as your heart hurts from the longing. Waiting can be lonely, feeling like you’re left tapping your foot impatiently while the rest of the world walks out on you.

I imagine that Zachariah and Elizabeth knew well the pain of waiting. The pleas to God that felt unanswered, the hurt of watching others grow their family while theirs remained a party of two, the challenge to their faith as they turned another year older on the calendar, their hair was getting grayer and still they waited.

Ultimately, Zachariah and Elizabeth made it through the waiting and they welcomed a little world changer named John. That lady who was waiting at the airport, I’m not sure if she ever got her reunion or not, I hope so.

If you my friend find yourself in the middle of a lengthy waiting period and it feels like you are at that airport gate watching everyone else have a reunion while you keep waiting and hoping your turn comes, I want you to know I see you. More importantly, God sees you.

You are not waiting because you are less than. You are not waiting because you are being punished. God is with us in our waiting. He is close in our waiting. He does not grow tired or weary of us in the waiting.

I don’t know how my story will end and I can’t begin to guess your grand finale either, but this I do know, as we move forward while waiting, God is the very best company and our waiting will not be wasted.

Happy Merry Messy Christmas

I always have this image of the perfect Christmas in my mind.  A beautifully decorated tree, a wonderfully hosted party, homemade Christmas goodies, thoughtful gifts for all, family gathered round, carols by candlelight and lots of Christmas cozy.  I am sure my visions of the “perfect” Christmas come from too many Hallmark movies and too much Pinterest surfing because the “perfect” Christmas has proven to be completely elusive.

Christmas in reality is, I run out of time and energy to get it all done and I focus full-time on trying to keep my Christmas peace in the midst of the busyness and chaos and I have an ache in my heart that always tends to grow a little stronger this time of year. Perfect is hard to accomplish but messy seems quite achievable! Continue reading “Happy Merry Messy Christmas”

He Gets It

Do you ever feel like no one understands what you are going through?  I do!  Like your friends or even your family just don’t get it?  Me, again!

The other morning heading to work I was feeling a little weary, a little hurt, a little angry a little a lot of things, I guess.  I was thinking about someone who I am frustrated with.  I guess I felt let down by this individual and I felt justified in my feelings.  The fact that this individual had not met what I feel are reasonable expectations left me feeling, hurt and a bit rejected during an already difficult period.  I was struggling in that moment to let it go, to forgive, especially absent an apology or acknowledgment of any wrong doing, which I wasn’t holding my breath for. Continue reading “He Gets It”

First Responder OR Nuclear Reactor?

Several weeks ago now, I was running late getting out the door for work. It was extra cold that morning and the zipper on my coat was stuck, so I had been wrestling with it for about 10 minutes with my frustration level growing as the clock ticked. I finally gave up and decided, I’d have to just slip the coat over my head and try to wrestle with it some more later. I then went to finish getting ready and my 350 degree flat iron started to fall off the counter. I reacted quickly and grabbed for it! Only problem is, I missed the handle and grabbed the actual iron! Owww!!  The pain caused me to drop it and it fell to the floor where I was then able to pick it up by the handle.

In the following moments while digging through the closet to find some burn cream, God dropped a pretty clear thought into my heart and mind. I don’t know that I appreciated it all that much in the moment, but it would be futile to argue with the truth or God for that matter! Continue reading “First Responder OR Nuclear Reactor?”