As with most things I sit down to write, I do so from a place of miss not mastery. I think it’s important to point this out for a few reasons.
- To remind myself that my weaknesses and yours if we let them, can be used maybe even more so than our wins.
- To ensure I’m honest with you and myself that I don’t have it all figured out. Not even close.
- To confess that I’d like to write as a subject matter expert, but I’m not and that means I usually have to wrestle with myself before I am willing to put my mess in words.
If after all this, you still want to proceed, well you’ve been warned 🙂
Several years ago I was on a solo road trip, headed home from a visit with my friend in California. I guess to increase the adventure factor and see some new scenery, I decided to veer off my normal I-5 route. You know, as Mr. Frost would say, “take the road less traveled”.
Now had I been on my usual route, I could’ve easily determined where to fill up my gas tank and I’d already established my usual spots, however, this trip I was in unchartered territory. I wasn’t sure where to fill up or when my next opportunity may come. I saw an exit coming up with a gas station logo on the sign and looked down at my fuel tank indicator on the dash noting I had about a quarter of a tank. I was getting low and quickly considered, “Do I stop now or hold out for the next opportunity?” For whatever reason, I decided to keep it moving, I had a bit of increasing concern as I passed the exit but was not in a full blown panic mode yet, however, the longer I kept a look out for a gas station sign, the more my anxiety grew.
Next thing I know, a light on the dashboard catches my attention. The gaslight indicator is now on and I’m faced with the fact that I’m officially running on empty. This means I likely have about 20 miles before I’m stranded on the side of the road in the middle of nothingness with little to no cell phone reception in a 100+ degree heat. If only I had pulled off and fueled up when I had the opportunity!
This is the road trip memory that has come back to me recently as I think about my life and it’s current state. If I’m being honest, I’ve been running on fumes for awhile, maybe I’ve been trying to outrun some things, maybe it’s been a push to make it to my desired destination, maybe I’ve been zoned out focusing on the wrong things and missed the indicators. Maybe, you find yourself, like me, running on empty and feeling like you’re just trying to limp yourself along to some fuel or worse yet, maybe you’re already broken down on the side of the road wondering if help will come.
Here’s the tough part, I don’t know all the answers and even if I did, it’s hard when you’re running on empty to have the drive to accomplish whatever the answer may require. Here are a few thoughts I’ve been considering as I attempt to address my own empty tank.
- Face the Facts – You can’t do much to get out of a dire situation if you haven’t admitted you’re in one.
- It’s OK to Need Help – I call AAA if I need roadside assistance but who do I call when I need assistance with life? Prayer, a friend, a therapist, call for help, we all need it but only some of us are willing to admit it. Be willing to ask for what you need.
- Find Something That Fills You Up – Every day, find one thing. It can be overwhelming to see all that may need some repair in your life. So pick something, just one thing each day that will fuel your soul a bit. Get outside in nature, meet a friend for coffee, listen to some great music, have some self care, whatever fills you up, do some of that.
- Be Patient With Yourself – Berating yourself, getting frustrated with your progress, this does nothing to get you further down the road. Give yourself time, drop the comparisons and be nice to you.
- Remember Pit Stops are Necessary – If you’re emotional, physical or spiritual gas light indicator is on, pay attention and pull over. Sit for a moment and assess your situation. Don’t just keep moving, it’s alright to take a breath or two, get some perspective, fuel up and when you are rested enough, continue. This way you can head back out on the open road and actually enjoy the trip.
Ultimately, I did make it to the gas station on fumes, filled up and made it home. However, my approach to this particular road trip wasn’t the best idea and it’s certainly not the way to approach life even though many of us do. My hope for you and for myself is that we learn to fuel up and make pit stops regularly, so we can accomplish all we are meant to on this road trip of life until we reach our final destination.
Neeserisms 